Your Origin Story Is an SOP: Onboarding Etiquette That Scales

As explained by Mad Men’s Joan Holloway…

Charm makes the sale; structure keeps it.
And if you remember nothing else, remember that.

Most businesses lose authority in the first thirty days. Not because the work is poor, but because the story is sloppy. Expectations drift. Communication gets awkward. Feedback arrives sideways. And suddenly everyone is wondering who dropped the ball—when the truth is, no one ever agreed on the rules of the game.

Onboarding is not admin. It’s etiquette. It is the moment where you quietly teach a client how to treat you, how to work with you, and what kind of professional relationship you intend to have. It is the first chapter of the story you’re about to write together—and like any good opening, it sets tone, pace, and point of view.

Charm makes the sale; structure keeps it.

If you skip it, you’re being impolite. You’re asking your client to guess. And guessing is where respect goes to die.

A proper onboarding doesn’t overwhelm. It orients. It says: this is how things work here, and it does so without apology. That’s not rigid. That’s gracious. People relax when they know what to expect.

Here is what elegant onboarding actually includes—not as bureaucracy, but as good manners made visible:

Onboarding Etiquette: The First Chapter

1. The Welcome Packet (Tone-Setter)
   Open with a brief origin story: who you are, why you work this way, and what success looks like here. This is not marketing—it’s orientation.
2. Communication Norms (No Guessing)
   State where communication happens, response times, and what qualifies as urgent. Clarity here prevents resentment later.
3. The Milestone Map (Plot Structure)
   Outline the phases of the work, decision points, and review moments. People behave better when they can see the arc.
4. Feedback Etiquette (Voice Protection)
   Explain how notes are given, who consolidates them, and what kind of feedback moves the work forward. Notes refine; rewrites derail.
5. Archetype of Service (Who You Are in the Story)
   Name your dominant archetype—Guide, Magician, Ruler—and how that shapes your approach. This sets expectations without ego.
6. Etiquette Agreements (Boundaries, Politely)
   Deposits, timelines, scope changes, and pauses belong here. Written once. Referred to calmly.

Notice what’s missing: drama. Apologies. Over-explaining. Onboarding etiquette is confident because it’s considerate. It assumes the other party wants to succeed—and shows them how.

When you lead with a narrative-driven onboarding, clients don’t test boundaries. They understand them. They know when feedback is welcome and when decisions are final. They know who you are in the story, and what role they play alongside you.

This is how onboarding scales. Not by adding more documents, but by anchoring every project in a shared story with clear norms. Structure isn’t cold. It’s courteous. And when done well, it frees everyone to focus on the work instead of the misunderstandings.

Because the truth is simple: the way you begin is the way you will be treated.